Praying W.I.F.E. Forum

Post-event Takeaways: From Ruins To Restoration with Tye and Elaine Ongpauco

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Glory to God for a wonderful talk by Tye and Elaine Ongpauco, living witnesses to the Resurrection Power of Jesus Christ for what looked like a dead, loveless, hopeless marriage.

Consistent Christlikeness, Unconditional forgiveness, fixing eyes on Jesus and choosing joy in the Lord despite the temporary trials, Elaine set her heart on The Blesser.

The blessings were only a bonus: joy, steadfastness, intimacy with her Eternal Husband (Isa 54:5), enabling to forgive and love the way He forgives and loved her. That attracted her husband to her and then to Him. A restored marriage, and now partnership in serving the Lord thru different ministries.

“You intended to harm me,
but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.” Gen‬ ‭50:20‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Rom‬ ‭8:28‬ ‭NLT‬‬

——

Sis Ri: I’m more than blessed (understatement nga siguro) by the talk today, not because the focus were on the speakers, but mostly because God’s GLORY alone, shone on them, on the humility of the talk, and the selflessness of the speakers. It’s like I’m listening to a live book in the Bible, because to share things they shared, is so Christlike. The Blesser was the one that was objectified/embodied in the sharing. they were very genuine, no holds-barred , down-to-earth experiences and showed how real God is working not only in their marriage, but more so in their individual/personal Christian lives. I give back the glory to God, because His Spirit, His Son, were the main thought I saw in them and heard. Suffering and trials are part and parcel of God’s holiness in their testimony——such that they were like Romans8:28 in person, kahit Hindi naman naging bed of Roses even after the reconciliation. You are a manifestation of Rom 8:28, all Glory to God alone! May you live up to your individual calling in His Field, because ngaun Palang, you have been missionaries of Christ’s love to us wives, to me, for one. Thank you!

Thank you Tye and Elaine for sharing your hearts and hope with us.

Naiyak ako sa testimony ni Elaine and Tyrone! It was an eye opener for me to hear Tye’s side that husbands are in a trap having been caught in the consequences of their sin. Difficult decision being pulled by 2 lives they know they will hurt if they choose one. It became very clear to me that we wives need to be more intentional in our prayers for the salvation of our husbands and that they be freed from the trap Satan has made. I now see my husband as a victim, too, in torment, no longer as my oppressor. I need to envelop him with prayers. Just like what Elaine did, she stood in the gap with fervent prayers for her husband, focusing on her own relationship with God and entrusting their future to the Lord. ❤️🙏

“So blessed by today’s testimony. I had my share of tears as well, what struck me the most is when Tye said he saw and felt God’s forgiveness thru Elaine; thank you for today PWF and to you sis Elaine for witnessing to us how God works if we are a praying and obedient wife first to God, and thank you to your husband as well who gave us the husband’s perspective we all want to hear. Praise and Glory to our God.”

————

Sis Rose: “Thank you Elaine for being the example of how to completely surrender and submit all things to God. You have given me notes that will be my steps to follow.

Thank you Tyrone for sharing your own struggles and vulnerability that has given me more and more reasons to pray for and have more compassion for my husband.

Thank you PWF core staff for the support, reminder, shoulder to cry on, biblical guidelines and directions, and for making the time and effort for bible study and events that help us strengthen our relationship with God as we learn to make better choices not just options presented by the physical world. Thank God for giving you the burden to reach out and minister to wives.

I wish to share my reflections from the recent talk “Ruins to Restoration”

“…unknowingly participated in Satan’s plan…”

“I wanted him to change in my own time.”

“…I am the pharisee.” …”Thank you, for letting her know.” … “proud of being submissive.”
(Self-righteousness is a sin)

“Husbands do not wake up in the morning thinking or planning of things to hurt wives or the marriage.”

“He struggled… I could hear him cry…”
(Have compassion for the sinner for he, too is struggling [and in pain].

These are some of the words I heard from Elaine and Tyrone that pierced my heart.

Wanting to obey God to always be by His side, I struggled to be the person God wants me to be as I am easily swayed to give in to my old self.

Yes, I have changed so much as I began to allow God to show me the way to save my marriage. Even my husband saw the change in me. But the change seemed to be not enough. There are so many past pains and dreams unrealized even before our marriage that had turned into strongholds. These strongholds have been fortified over the years in our marriage that I was blinded by my own self-righteousness and I neglected to see the man I love was being hurt BY ME!

No more measure of who did what worse, sin is sin! The very things I accused my husband of doing to me are the same things I might as well be guilty of.

I knew I had a problem, and Elaine and Tyrone had given me the words to identify it. I was still participating in Satan’s plan of destroying my marriage. It has never been just my husband’s fault, not from the beginning, not during and not even to this day.

Sure I had ways to counter the schemes of the enemy but then I became self-righteous. Giving in to little “unharmful” things. But that’s just it. Satan uses the little “unharmful” things to take a foothold on us.

“I give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh.”
‭‭Ezekiel‬ ‭11:19‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Lord, reveal to me the sins of my heart that at the very second of having to make a choice, Holy Spirit, nudge me hard and strong not to give in to myself but to always submit to Christ, not to have second thoughts of turning away from my own desires of old self but to have an undivided heart obedient to God.

“We know that in everything God works for the good of those who love him. These are the people God chose, because that was his plan.”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:28‬ ‭ERV‬‬

Remind me always to “count every trial as a bridge to be good” not giving in to the pain but to make each pain a signal to behold Your glory in my life as I hold on to You not because I can but because You do. This I pray in Jesus name, AMEN.” –

————-

Sis Cecile: Good afternoon Ladies, my learnings from ruins to restoration last saturday. It really strucked me when Tye said that we should’nt be mad at our husband but to the sin and we are the only way to save our husbands from their adulterous sin.I was guilty kasi i focused on his shortcomings more than my contribution why he ended up in the arms of Ate Gurl. When i went home, i asked for God’s wisdom what are the right words to say to my husband. I sent him an email asking forgiveness to my shortcomings that has brought him to his present situation . I told him that I will never stop praying for him. I want him to have the same joy i am experiencing right now because of God’s grace. As expected I didn’t get any reply but I know God is working in both of us. Im thinking more of his salvation rather than our restoration, he used to be a good provider, father, husband most specially my bestfriend that’s why I want him to experience God’s grace as well. He as well is a victim of the enemy’s mission, to kill, steal and destroy. And we as their other half, their helper, we should never stop praying for their salvation.

———

Sis O2

Sorry po medyo late na:

Sis Elaine’s and Bro Tye’s testimony on the PWF FB page was instrumental that led me to PWF. I was trying my best not to cry the whole time, because most of the things they shared hit me to the bones.

“Whoever loves a quarrel loves sin; whoever builds a high gate invites destruction.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭17:19‬ ‭NIV‬‬
May we not learn this the hard way. May we not contribute to the plans of the enemy. The enemy’s spirit of “PRIDE” will make us believe that proving oneself who is right thru picking a fight is the “right” way to do it. Difficult as it may seem, but now I pray to be more mindful of the consequences of picking a fight and saying hurtful words to each other. Sometimes, bad fights will lead to rage and violence and unknowingly will unleash itself during the fight. Being kind is better than being right. We might regret a lot of things throughout our lives, but being kind is not one of them! Kindness is driven by a heart of love, and love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭18:21-22‬ ‭NIV‬‬
Forgiveness is not an emotion. It is an act. An on-going process. It’s a command by Jesus that we should always obey. “If we continue disobeying Him, and pursue a life of unforgiveness, God will also stop forgiving us.” (Matthew 6:15)

Release each person from our Inner-heart prison. Unforgiveness torments us and affects us physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally.
I have been trying my best and practice it every single day. I sort of “allowed” myself to desensitize trigger scenarios and flashbacks, and when I think about it, I always ask God and the Holy Spirit to help me say, “I forgive you husband and whoever I have wronged and even to those who wronged me, forgive me too, Lord, and I forgive myself, too”.
When the unfortunate time comes, (and I rebuke it, in Jesus’ name!) that the sins will be brought up, with the grace of God and the wisdom of the Holy Spirit, will help me how I should respond, and that is with a gentle and meek spirit. No more quarrels, for whoever loves a quarrel, loves sin.

I will never stop praying for my husband and his salvation. I will doubt no more, God! For You are always faithful, Lord Jesus. If God can sway a King’s heart, I know that God can change my prodigal husband’s heart, too and for my husband to go back to Jesus and believe in the gospel.

It is so heartwarming and delightful that I get to spend precious and priceless moments with the Lord. Thank you, Lord God for giving me this opportunity to go back to you. Your timing is always beautifully PERFECT. Always remind me Heavenly Father, to put You first in my list, all the time, always and forever.

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